Greetings,
Well, I have been cruising now for a couple of weeks doing stuff at home and with regard to several projects. This is not to mention my usual training sessions that I am involved in. All in all I have made some progress over the past couple of weeks, but I know what is coming around the corner... the crash.
The crash for me is usually the result of pushing myself a little hard for a single burst or over a period of time. For the most part in this instance it is the second one. This one has been building up for some time and I have been putting off the rest-breaks I should really have been having. What does this mean? This means I am going to pay for it in the not too distant future. It will probably result in some severe down-time for a couple of days while I recuperate.
At the moment I am putting this one off until after Easter. I have an examination to test in Renaissance fencing to do down near Gosford. My accommodation has been paid as has my flight down so all I have to do is hold this off until I get back and it will all be good. Of course this is going to have to result in some "artificial buoyancy" for the period, mainly consisting of more sugar and caffeine in my system while I am up and the possible increase of some pain medications overnight. Why would I do this to myself you would ask?
Because the effort is worth it. I would rather have some big high points in my life and have to put up with the lows that accompany it than just coast where it is comfortable. This is my nature I am stubborn and I refuse to let my condition determine what I will do in the future. I want to be able to do stuff now, and have the chance to do it again later. If this means that I have to pay for it... so be it. As far as I am concerned hitting the heights is most definitely worth the lows that accompany it.
Cheers,
Henry.
Monday, March 25, 2013
Friday, March 15, 2013
On Goals and Successes
Greetings,
The following entry in this blog is sort of a way of explanation. A couple of days ago I made a post on Facebook and Google+. I will admit that I was a little short tempered at the time and a little unimpressed. So I will present the post below and then explain a little more of what I meant with regard to that expression. The post was as follows:
1. Figure out what you want to do
We all tend to muddle through life a little at least. I suspect that even with the most focused of minds there are times where the targets are a little blurry. This step is about regaining the focus and figuring out what you want to do with yourself. This lays the foundation for the following steps, and in some ways is one of the most important steps. If you don't know what you want to do it is difficult to set goals for yourself. An important point here is that this target can be small or large, near or far. This is a personal journey.
With regard to this, this is for people who want focus. There are those of us who are quite happy to coast through life. This is fine. This is for when the coasting stops in their case. There are those of us who devote our time to other people all of our time. This is for when they decide that they want to do something for themselves, whether or not this assists others or not. As I have stated, this is a personal journey.
2. Set your own goals and work toward them.
This follows on nicely from the last one. Once you figure out where you want to be, you need to set goals in order to get there. You need short-term goals and long-term goals. Once you have the goals you need to work toward them. Seems relatively simple really, however this can be tricky. If all the goals are long-distance or long-term it will be difficult to see how to get there. Remember that you also need short-term goals as well.
The second part of this is can be a difficult thing. People can set goals but if they do nothing afterward they should not be surprised that they cannot get there. Being a personal journey these goals should not be dependent on other people only ourselves. These are goals for yourself. Do not hinge them on the success of someone else, only your own successes. You need to work toward the goals.
3. Do not compare your successes to others as it is not a relevant reference for your goals.
Even when you are on a similar path, comparing your successes to another's is irrelevant. So a person achieves a goal that you were going for, this does not mean that you should not also go toward it still. So a fellow student out-performs you, this does not reference your goals as theirs are not yours. Your goals are yours to achieve, you are the only person who is relevant in achieving them.
Even more importantly, your goals may be smaller than their goals. This is nothing to be ashamed of. You do what you can. If your goals are small, there will be more of them. It is important that these small goals build to a bigger goal. You need to achieve your goals for yourself.
4. Even if these goals do not yield "real world" results your goals are just as important as people's goals which do.
Everyone likes to hear of goals which are achieved. We hear them on the news, "Professor Smith has found a cure to a disease.", "Joe Blogs has won gold at the Olympics" and so forth. I do not expect that any of the goals which I have achieved or will achieve will ever be noticed in this form. This does not bother me in the least.
Goals which get "real world" acclaim are important, but it does not mean that all goals need to be like this. Every goal is important at least at a personal level for the individual who achieves them. This success is more important than any amount of acclaim which a person gets from the outside. I suppose I need to give a little bit of personal detail here.
I have now been fencing in some form for 20 years. This is an achievement in itself. I have been doing Renaissance martial arts for almost as long with a medieval and Renaissance recreation society for almost as long. In that time I have risen to the top levels in that society. This is an achievement which took at least 10 years out of that 20 year stretch. I have been teaching Renaissance martial arts for some time as well and have had students also raise themselves to the high levels with my assistance. In the "real world" this does not mean much, but it is an achievement that I am proud of. These are my goals, they are important to me, and that is all they need to be important to.
5. Be brave enough to evaluate your own level of work truthfully as you have only one person to blame if you are not getting there.
Self-evaluation is important and is also one of the hardest things. Step 5 is all about being truthful about the amount of work you have put in in order to get your goals. This is about not blaming others for your own lack of success. The only person who can achieve your goals is you, and thus you are the only person who can put in the work to get there.
We need to evaluate our own progress toward our goals and find the reasons for why we are not getting there. In some instances it is because the goal is too far to evaluate the success. In some instances it is because the goal is a bit too big for what we are capable at that point in time. In some instances circumstances have made the situation not appropriate for that goal at that point in time. However we also have to admit that sometimes it is because we have not put in as much work as we should have. In all these instances we have to be honest and find out the real reasons.
Most Important
Most important of all, they are your goals, you have to set them, and you have to work toward them. This is one of those times where people can help you toward your goal but the work is going to have to primarily be done by you. Be honest in your evaluation of your goals and also your efforts toward your goals. Both of these are important.
Cheers,
Henry.
The following entry in this blog is sort of a way of explanation. A couple of days ago I made a post on Facebook and Google+. I will admit that I was a little short tempered at the time and a little unimpressed. So I will present the post below and then explain a little more of what I meant with regard to that expression. The post was as follows:
Just a short bitch... On Goals and SuccessesAs I stated, I was unimpressed at the time and now I have some time to look back at what I wrote and give a little more explanation as to what I meant by my five step plan. More to the point I can explain a little about what I have been doing with regard to my own.
1. Figure out what you want to do.
2. Set your own goals and go toward them.
3. Do not compare your successes to others as it is not a relevant reference for *your* goals.
4. Even if these goals do not yield "real world" results your goals are just as important as peoples' goals which do.
5. Be brave enough to evaluate your own level of work truthfully as you have only one person to blame if you are not getting there.
Sorry, I just needed to get this out of my system.
1. Figure out what you want to do
We all tend to muddle through life a little at least. I suspect that even with the most focused of minds there are times where the targets are a little blurry. This step is about regaining the focus and figuring out what you want to do with yourself. This lays the foundation for the following steps, and in some ways is one of the most important steps. If you don't know what you want to do it is difficult to set goals for yourself. An important point here is that this target can be small or large, near or far. This is a personal journey.
With regard to this, this is for people who want focus. There are those of us who are quite happy to coast through life. This is fine. This is for when the coasting stops in their case. There are those of us who devote our time to other people all of our time. This is for when they decide that they want to do something for themselves, whether or not this assists others or not. As I have stated, this is a personal journey.
2. Set your own goals and work toward them.
This follows on nicely from the last one. Once you figure out where you want to be, you need to set goals in order to get there. You need short-term goals and long-term goals. Once you have the goals you need to work toward them. Seems relatively simple really, however this can be tricky. If all the goals are long-distance or long-term it will be difficult to see how to get there. Remember that you also need short-term goals as well.
The second part of this is can be a difficult thing. People can set goals but if they do nothing afterward they should not be surprised that they cannot get there. Being a personal journey these goals should not be dependent on other people only ourselves. These are goals for yourself. Do not hinge them on the success of someone else, only your own successes. You need to work toward the goals.
3. Do not compare your successes to others as it is not a relevant reference for your goals.
Even when you are on a similar path, comparing your successes to another's is irrelevant. So a person achieves a goal that you were going for, this does not mean that you should not also go toward it still. So a fellow student out-performs you, this does not reference your goals as theirs are not yours. Your goals are yours to achieve, you are the only person who is relevant in achieving them.
Even more importantly, your goals may be smaller than their goals. This is nothing to be ashamed of. You do what you can. If your goals are small, there will be more of them. It is important that these small goals build to a bigger goal. You need to achieve your goals for yourself.
4. Even if these goals do not yield "real world" results your goals are just as important as people's goals which do.
Everyone likes to hear of goals which are achieved. We hear them on the news, "Professor Smith has found a cure to a disease.", "Joe Blogs has won gold at the Olympics" and so forth. I do not expect that any of the goals which I have achieved or will achieve will ever be noticed in this form. This does not bother me in the least.
Goals which get "real world" acclaim are important, but it does not mean that all goals need to be like this. Every goal is important at least at a personal level for the individual who achieves them. This success is more important than any amount of acclaim which a person gets from the outside. I suppose I need to give a little bit of personal detail here.
I have now been fencing in some form for 20 years. This is an achievement in itself. I have been doing Renaissance martial arts for almost as long with a medieval and Renaissance recreation society for almost as long. In that time I have risen to the top levels in that society. This is an achievement which took at least 10 years out of that 20 year stretch. I have been teaching Renaissance martial arts for some time as well and have had students also raise themselves to the high levels with my assistance. In the "real world" this does not mean much, but it is an achievement that I am proud of. These are my goals, they are important to me, and that is all they need to be important to.
5. Be brave enough to evaluate your own level of work truthfully as you have only one person to blame if you are not getting there.
Self-evaluation is important and is also one of the hardest things. Step 5 is all about being truthful about the amount of work you have put in in order to get your goals. This is about not blaming others for your own lack of success. The only person who can achieve your goals is you, and thus you are the only person who can put in the work to get there.
We need to evaluate our own progress toward our goals and find the reasons for why we are not getting there. In some instances it is because the goal is too far to evaluate the success. In some instances it is because the goal is a bit too big for what we are capable at that point in time. In some instances circumstances have made the situation not appropriate for that goal at that point in time. However we also have to admit that sometimes it is because we have not put in as much work as we should have. In all these instances we have to be honest and find out the real reasons.
Most Important
Most important of all, they are your goals, you have to set them, and you have to work toward them. This is one of those times where people can help you toward your goal but the work is going to have to primarily be done by you. Be honest in your evaluation of your goals and also your efforts toward your goals. Both of these are important.
Cheers,
Henry.
Saturday, March 9, 2013
FM for Others
Greetings,
The idea of what other people can do to help a person with fibromyalgia has been something which has been rattling around in my head of late. This mainly comes from a point of people not understanding what having FM is like and also not understanding about what a person with fibromyalgia really wants in the way of support. In some ways this comes from not understanding the condition itself, but it is not just that.
Dealing with someone with a chronic condition is difficult for others most especially where they do not understand what the person wants. It is even more difficult where the person with the condition is unable to articulate what is going on or what they want. In this way it is really a two-way street in that information needs to be flowing in both directions for real understanding. With this situation in play, it is of little surprise that people get frustrated, on both sides.
So I will start with something simple. A person (friend or family) with FM approaches you and looks like they are not doing well at that time. As well as many of us have learnt to hide our pain, there is still evidence of it present. You ask how they are doing, they give you a list of what hurts and in what way (if you are lucky). Here is where people go wrong, it is not sympathy that the person wants here, they want some understanding and empathy. This is a not a competition for the "Mine hurts more than yours" trophy. You will find that empathising with the person will do a lot more for them than sympathy.
One of the greatest things about FM is the feeling of being alone. When a person empathises with them with regard to their condition, and they can see even a glimmer of understanding, the individual with the FM can see that they are not alone, and will begin to feel better. This is really simple but really useful. Sympathy is like a pat on the head and a pass off to the next topic. Empathy is engagement with another person with a degree of understanding and this is so much more useful.
The feeling of being alone also affects other things especially where it comes to getting support which can aid them. The feeling of being isolated means that many develop tough skins and become highly independent individuals. Used to struggling alone and dealing with what they can. This independence unfortunately also makes it difficult for them to ask for help, even when it is really needed. This is where some of the understanding which was mentioned before becomes even more important.
If it is your first time dealing with a person with a chronic condition knowing what to do and when is hard. This is because it is difficult to understand what is going on with the individual. It is at this time that engagement on your part is necessary, remember the point about empathy made before. Once you understand what is going on it is easier to see the signs where help would be appreciated, even if it is not asked for.
It is surprising but at this point in time, it is where the small things help. Getting an item, or volunteering to do so is helpful. Even if the request is denied, once again there is the feeling of not being alone as indicated above. Many people with FM have issues with asking for help due to some of the stigma attached to the condition, so they will often struggle, or simply do without. Small amounts of assistance go a long way at this point in time. Simple things will all person to understand that help is out there and all they have to do is ask. This may take some time though.
Most of the highly independent individuals will push until they cannot, and even at this point in time will deny help, it is at this point in time if help is denied, it may help to be a little forceful in your approach. Encouraging the help will often break through such stubbornness and make the individual realise that it is okay to ask for help, or even accept it.
This is a rather rough guide for dealing with an individual with FM. It can also apply to people with other conditions also. Many of these individuals will not ask for help, but when it is offered will take it, or understand that they are not alone. Remember it is understanding that these people want, a degree of empathy. Sympathy is a stop-gap measure, empathy and understanding are much more useful and give much more aid.
Cheers,
Henry.
The idea of what other people can do to help a person with fibromyalgia has been something which has been rattling around in my head of late. This mainly comes from a point of people not understanding what having FM is like and also not understanding about what a person with fibromyalgia really wants in the way of support. In some ways this comes from not understanding the condition itself, but it is not just that.
Dealing with someone with a chronic condition is difficult for others most especially where they do not understand what the person wants. It is even more difficult where the person with the condition is unable to articulate what is going on or what they want. In this way it is really a two-way street in that information needs to be flowing in both directions for real understanding. With this situation in play, it is of little surprise that people get frustrated, on both sides.
So I will start with something simple. A person (friend or family) with FM approaches you and looks like they are not doing well at that time. As well as many of us have learnt to hide our pain, there is still evidence of it present. You ask how they are doing, they give you a list of what hurts and in what way (if you are lucky). Here is where people go wrong, it is not sympathy that the person wants here, they want some understanding and empathy. This is a not a competition for the "Mine hurts more than yours" trophy. You will find that empathising with the person will do a lot more for them than sympathy.
One of the greatest things about FM is the feeling of being alone. When a person empathises with them with regard to their condition, and they can see even a glimmer of understanding, the individual with the FM can see that they are not alone, and will begin to feel better. This is really simple but really useful. Sympathy is like a pat on the head and a pass off to the next topic. Empathy is engagement with another person with a degree of understanding and this is so much more useful.
The feeling of being alone also affects other things especially where it comes to getting support which can aid them. The feeling of being isolated means that many develop tough skins and become highly independent individuals. Used to struggling alone and dealing with what they can. This independence unfortunately also makes it difficult for them to ask for help, even when it is really needed. This is where some of the understanding which was mentioned before becomes even more important.
If it is your first time dealing with a person with a chronic condition knowing what to do and when is hard. This is because it is difficult to understand what is going on with the individual. It is at this time that engagement on your part is necessary, remember the point about empathy made before. Once you understand what is going on it is easier to see the signs where help would be appreciated, even if it is not asked for.
It is surprising but at this point in time, it is where the small things help. Getting an item, or volunteering to do so is helpful. Even if the request is denied, once again there is the feeling of not being alone as indicated above. Many people with FM have issues with asking for help due to some of the stigma attached to the condition, so they will often struggle, or simply do without. Small amounts of assistance go a long way at this point in time. Simple things will all person to understand that help is out there and all they have to do is ask. This may take some time though.
Most of the highly independent individuals will push until they cannot, and even at this point in time will deny help, it is at this point in time if help is denied, it may help to be a little forceful in your approach. Encouraging the help will often break through such stubbornness and make the individual realise that it is okay to ask for help, or even accept it.
This is a rather rough guide for dealing with an individual with FM. It can also apply to people with other conditions also. Many of these individuals will not ask for help, but when it is offered will take it, or understand that they are not alone. Remember it is understanding that these people want, a degree of empathy. Sympathy is a stop-gap measure, empathy and understanding are much more useful and give much more aid.
Cheers,
Henry.
Wednesday, March 6, 2013
Doing Stuff
Greetings Readers,
So, the title of this one is really specific... NOT. This one is about how I deal with my condition in general and some ideas about the implementation of some of the other stuff which I have already spoken about previously. You will have to excuse the format a little as I am going to do this all off the top of my head while the ideas are flowing.
First thing about doing stuff is that it is important. It is important that you find things to do. Do not expect other people to find things for you to do, though they will in some cases. You need to find something that you want to do that is going to motivate you. This needs to be something that you are interested in and something that you are not easily distracted from. In my case I have two things, writing and fencing, or as Miyamoto Musashi would put it "the art of the pen and sword". The two work really well together.
I have all sorts of projects on the run. Some of these are for the benefit of others in the long run and some of them I am doing because I am simply interested in doing them. I will admit even the ones which are for others I do because I am also interested in them. What is really neat is when I can link on to the other.
Blogs, I have three. I have this one, I have one on fencing (http://afencersramblings.blogspot.com.au/), and I have one on Elizabethan English (http://oldewordes.blogspot.com.au/). These are designed to encourage me to write. This blog is the most personal one of the lot. The other two are more formal, though the most formal one is the Elizabethan English, for the most part. The blogs cover three different subjects and I try to make regular posts on all of them. As can be seen this ties in with my fencing... and even more than you would realise.
To be more specific I study Historical European Martial Arts (HEMA) rather than modern sport fencing. This means the instructions which I read, and techniques which result from this, come from manuals from the medieval and Renaissance period. Thus rather than a foil, epee, or sabre, my primary weapon is a rapier, though I have been investigating a bit of longsword here and there. I have found this pursuit, which I started some 20 years ago, has assisted in keeping me motivated, and more to the point my FM more under control. This is because it is movement and has me being motivated relied upon it. I have fought from a chair when my legs were giving me trouble due to the FM, this is either the definition of motivation or being too stubborn for my own good.
My interest in the English of the Elizabethan period should be a little obvious, aside from the fact that I am a history nut and enjoy reading about history, more focused on medieval and Renaissance more recently. I have one particular manual which I have been studying for quite some time, Vincentio Saviolo's "His Practice in Two Books" (http://www.umass.edu/renaissance/lord/pdfs/Saviolo_1595.pdf). No surprise it was published in 1595 and thus written in Elizabethan English. I am studying Elizabethan English in effect so I can understand the language better in order to decipher this manual better in order to be able to perform it better.
I have found that staying active in some form allows me to better cope with my FM and my level of fitness and health as been at least maintained, if not improved, because of this activity. Sure there are days when fencing is out, so I tend to do more research. Sure there are days when both are out, and that is time to rest. Rest is something which we all need. The point is that when it is available, and you can, you should do something with yourself, I have no doubts that this will make you feel better about yourself at least if not improve your condition.
Hey, I am not claiming that my approach works for everyone, nor am I claiming that this is some miracle cure, what I am saying is that you should give it a go and see how it goes. The feeling of accomplishment, no matter how small is an awesome feeling and it can only be good for you. Your mental state is important and constructive things which you can do to improve it can only be good.
Cheers,
Henry.
So, the title of this one is really specific... NOT. This one is about how I deal with my condition in general and some ideas about the implementation of some of the other stuff which I have already spoken about previously. You will have to excuse the format a little as I am going to do this all off the top of my head while the ideas are flowing.
First thing about doing stuff is that it is important. It is important that you find things to do. Do not expect other people to find things for you to do, though they will in some cases. You need to find something that you want to do that is going to motivate you. This needs to be something that you are interested in and something that you are not easily distracted from. In my case I have two things, writing and fencing, or as Miyamoto Musashi would put it "the art of the pen and sword". The two work really well together.
I have all sorts of projects on the run. Some of these are for the benefit of others in the long run and some of them I am doing because I am simply interested in doing them. I will admit even the ones which are for others I do because I am also interested in them. What is really neat is when I can link on to the other.
Blogs, I have three. I have this one, I have one on fencing (http://afencersramblings.blogspot.com.au/), and I have one on Elizabethan English (http://oldewordes.blogspot.com.au/). These are designed to encourage me to write. This blog is the most personal one of the lot. The other two are more formal, though the most formal one is the Elizabethan English, for the most part. The blogs cover three different subjects and I try to make regular posts on all of them. As can be seen this ties in with my fencing... and even more than you would realise.
To be more specific I study Historical European Martial Arts (HEMA) rather than modern sport fencing. This means the instructions which I read, and techniques which result from this, come from manuals from the medieval and Renaissance period. Thus rather than a foil, epee, or sabre, my primary weapon is a rapier, though I have been investigating a bit of longsword here and there. I have found this pursuit, which I started some 20 years ago, has assisted in keeping me motivated, and more to the point my FM more under control. This is because it is movement and has me being motivated relied upon it. I have fought from a chair when my legs were giving me trouble due to the FM, this is either the definition of motivation or being too stubborn for my own good.
My interest in the English of the Elizabethan period should be a little obvious, aside from the fact that I am a history nut and enjoy reading about history, more focused on medieval and Renaissance more recently. I have one particular manual which I have been studying for quite some time, Vincentio Saviolo's "His Practice in Two Books" (http://www.umass.edu/renaissance/lord/pdfs/Saviolo_1595.pdf). No surprise it was published in 1595 and thus written in Elizabethan English. I am studying Elizabethan English in effect so I can understand the language better in order to decipher this manual better in order to be able to perform it better.
I have found that staying active in some form allows me to better cope with my FM and my level of fitness and health as been at least maintained, if not improved, because of this activity. Sure there are days when fencing is out, so I tend to do more research. Sure there are days when both are out, and that is time to rest. Rest is something which we all need. The point is that when it is available, and you can, you should do something with yourself, I have no doubts that this will make you feel better about yourself at least if not improve your condition.
Hey, I am not claiming that my approach works for everyone, nor am I claiming that this is some miracle cure, what I am saying is that you should give it a go and see how it goes. The feeling of accomplishment, no matter how small is an awesome feeling and it can only be good for you. Your mental state is important and constructive things which you can do to improve it can only be good.
Cheers,
Henry.
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