1/365 is Not Enough

 Greetings,

Last year I gave an update of my list of illnesses that were current (https://alifewithfibromyalgia.blogspot.com/2019/09/the-list-i-am-here.html) just to let people know exactly what is going on with me, should they really want to know. Well, this year has been no picnic I can tell you and the COVID-19 pandemic has been just the beginning of it. You throw in costochondritis on top, which has this habit of imitating a heart attack, and things have not been a hell of a lot of fun. (Yes, I have chest pain, and can't breathe properly. No, I don't want you to call an ambulance. I can't breathe properly because I have chest pain. No, it is not my lungs.) Not to mention the other parts of my body have been playing their usual merry hell. Oh, the COVID pandemic has been lots of fun too, especially when you are one of the "high risk" category. Crazy when the rules that you have been following and trying to get others to follow suddenly become policy...

... stay home when unwell.
... wash your hands.

... stay away from sick people, and distance from people in general.

So here we are on "R U OK?" Day again and social media is being flooded with memes and bits and pieces of people asking the simple question. Well, again I am going to say, "No, I am not OK, and I have damned good reasons not to be." That being said, this is my state of affairs. This is what I have to deal with.

I do not expect people to be checking in on me every day, or even today, aside from the fencing class that I have this afternoon. In fact if people did try to check on me every day I would find it truly irritating, but that is just who I am. I work through things myself, for the most part. When I need help, I will get around to asking. Yes, my wife, and my doctor both think this should be more often.

One day out of 365 is not enough, people need to be reaching out to one another all of the other 364 days of the year as well. It is even more so in the current situation with the pandemic going on. People are not "OK" at all. People are feeling isolated, people are feeling like their world is crashing down around them (in some cases it is), people are being confused by different messages which are being put out there, and all of this is creating stress on people. Even for people who aren't "at risk" i.e. those with mental health issues, this is rough.

Make time to talk to your friends and family. Use some of that endless phone credit you have. Use some of that endless internet time you have. Get in touch, make a connection, talk to someone. Make a real connection with them, see how they are really going. Make a habit of doing this. If people took it upon themselves to do this it could change things a lot.

Go find a friend or someone in your family to talk to. Not just today, but other days in the year. Make a change for the better. They are interested in what's going on in your life, just as you are actually interested in theirs. Just try it. The time you have in their company will be time you are happy you spent.

Cheers,

Henry.

Where has "The Dream" Gone?

Greetings,

Of late I have had a lot of time to think. I have been a member, paid and unpaid, of the Society for Creative Anachronism (SCA) now since 1992. This means I have been interacting with various parts of this organisation for some time. I have seen some of the great parts about it, and I have also seen some of the not so great parts about it. Problem at the moment is the latter seems to be overshadowing the former of late, and I am losing my faith in the SCA and seriously asking myself whether or not it is time to move on.

This is a post which has been sitting around waiting to be written for a long time, though it was a symptom of a year of some severe loses and resulting impacts on my life. The more I think about it, I think that these elements have only served to highlight what my usually positive attitude has been hiding for a long time. As I have stated I am a long-standing member of the SCA, I have participated in all three forms of combat in some part, and excelled in rapier combat. I have accrued various titles as a result of my interactions with others and also dedication to what I had chosen to do. I am not going to go into any detail here as I do not think that there is any point, this is mere background.

For me at the moment, the fantasy is gone. Titles and awards to me have begun to mean nothing to me so I strive only to do those things which are of interest to me, or which will assist those friends which I have within various groups. This has resulted in a loss of excitement. I used to get excited about the next event I would be going to and would go out of my way to go to as many as I could. Now I only attend those which I really feel like going to or those which I have been asked to attend.

During my time in the SCA I have gained quite a bit of skill in the art of rapier combat, as a result I have won quite a few tournaments in my time. I used to be really enthusiastic about the prospect of a tournament and the chance to show off my skill and come out on top, now not so much. These victories do not hold the enticement they once had.

The Society itself has changed, within the groups it can be seen that the high ideals that used to be expressed by its members in word and deed both on and off the field seem to be diminished. The importance of Courtesy and Chivalry both on and off the field of battle seems to have been lost somewhere in the importance of titles and making a good impression on those with supposed power within the groups. Politics is invading all parts of the Society, there is nowhere to hide. I have had some friends who have been lost and others who have reduced their contact due to politics, and indeed problems can result by the mere association with people of the "wrong" character. The determination being up to another group of people. The result of this is that the openness of groups that I once experienced seems to have disappeared and now it is difficult to find common ground with many people, even though we are all playing the same game.

The Society, at least in Australia, has become a victim of its own success and circumstances. As research in subjects and knowledge has grown, so too has the expectation of the performance and dress of its members. It would seem that gone are the days where a person would be accepted turning up in a t-tunic and jeans, just as much as the person who researches every element of their attire. Research expectations have also grown, if every element is not researched, it can almost be expected that someone will criticise the work which has been done, or not done as the case may be. In this there is no encouragement and direction for further research mere criticism of the work which has been done. What is the most concerning about these standards is that such standards are even put upon newcomers and this quite frequently scares them away, the leeway of time to get established is gone, the expectations have replaced it.

Conservatism has invaded the groups in action and in the dress of individuals. These outside aspects, more appropriate to a Victorian recreation group have found themselves present in this medieval and Renaissance group. Along with this has gone the sense of humour and sense of fun. Many of the individuals take things much too seriously and have forgotten the humorous and cheeky elements which were always present in the past.

So with all of these elements present the question which has to be put is; is it time to move on? The question that follows is where to? HEMA? I have already referred to my new School the School of Historical Defense Arts (SHDA) as my "retirement" plan. It covers all of the elements of research and combat which I enjoy without the other elements which I so dislike. Or should I keep fighting and hope that things improve? There are still people in the SCA with whom I am still good friends, and events which I attend which I do still enjoy.

I think at this stage that a partial movement away, while maintaining some contact is the best way at the moment. I will stay involved with the SCA and attend those events which I choose to, and be with those people who I like to be with and see how it goes. I hope that sometime in the future the SCA gains some of what it has lost and that my faith is restored, as I believe it would be a sorry day for me to move completely away and leave all of those people who I still call true friends behind.

Cheers,

Henry.